Daniel Tosh & Assholes Of The World, Rape Jokes Aren’t Funny

There are few things that bother me more than people who don’t take rape and sexual assault seriously. Whether they’re brushing it off with a “well you don’t know his side of the story,” blaming the incident on flirting and alcohol, or calling someone a liar (seriously?), it all raises my blood pressure a surprising amount. But rape jokes? Those really grind my gears.

I find that people who make rape jokes are often the same people who pride themselves on being “un-pc” and make it their duty to offend others. Take a look at Daniel Tosh, a popular comedian on Comedy Central, for instance. He loves to make offensive jokes. It’s his entire schtick. And when a person at a show of his took a stand during a skit specifically about rape jokes, he “joked” about how funny it would be if that person were to be raped:

After I called out to him, Tosh paused for a moment. Then, he says, “Wouldn’t it be funny if that girl got raped by like, 5 guys right now? Like right now? What if a bunch of guys just raped her…” and I, completely stunned and finding it hard to process what was happening but knowing I needed to get out of there, immediately nudged my friend, who was also completely stunned, and we high-tailed it out of there. It was humiliating, of course, especially as the audience guffawed in response to Tosh, their eyes following us as we made our way out of there. I didn’t hear the rest of what he said about me.

Tell me, why is it actually socially acceptable to say things like that? Why on Earth do people find this funny? That’s not funny. That’s effing terrifying.

When someone makes a rape joke, all I hear is “I don’t care about you or anyone else who has ever been raped.” I don’t hear a punchline. I certainly don’t hear humor. What I hear is “rape is a joke.”

It’s not even that rape jokes make me angry. They make me scared. If a person has the ability to comfortably joke about rape, what’s stopping them from actually raping someone? In my eyes, I see nothing stopping them. It really, truly scares me.

What makes it even worse is that these jokesters always act like those of us who get offended are the ones in the wrong. I’m sorry, which one of us is making jokes about sexual violence? … Oh, right. I’m not uptight because I didn’t like your rape joke. Your rape joke wasn’t funny and it never will be, because rape is not funny.

All of this enables a culture that promotes violence against women, a culture in which women have to be afraid of every stranger that tells them they’re beautiful, and walk with keys between their fingers at night. It’s a culture that says “don’t get raped” instead of “don’t rape.” No one should have to be afraid to walk alone, wear a short skirt, or say no. And we especially should not have to be afraid to take a stand against rape jokes in a comedy club.

If you find rape jokes funny, you find rape funny. Honestly, there’s no ifs, ands, or buts about it. If you feel that you take rape seriously, then you will stop making and laughing at rape jokes. You can’t have both. No devil’s advocate here. No “to be fair….” No. Just stop.

If you want to be like Daniel Tosh and make jokes about five guys raping one woman and have your entire comedic career be centered around offending people, then hey, do it. I can’t stop you. But don’t call those of us who get offended uptight and turn it around on us. Maybe it’s not that we’re taking it too seriously. Maybe it’s that you’re not taking it seriously enough.

If you agree with me, please sign my petition on Change.org to get Daniel Tosh taken off the air at Comedy Central.

What are your thoughts on this comedian’s idea of “humor”? Leave a comment and let us know.

Written by Alisse Desrosiers
Follow her on Twitter and Tumblr!

Opinions stated in our editorials do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Feminspire and its staff as a whole, but instead reflect the opinions of the writer.

http://twitter.com/emilysteers Emily Steers

rape jokes aren’t funny, and i wouldn’t support a comedian who made jokes glorifying the sexual assault and battery of any person. and what really, really, really pushes this over the line is the suggestion of violence toward an audience member. THAT is why this guy’s career needs to stall NOW.
- http://www.facebook.com/alisse.desrosiers Alisse Marie
  
  100% agree with you! Offensive jokes are bad enough as it is, we don’t need comedians making violent jokes directly at an audience member. All that does is reinforce this sexist society.
http://www.facebook.com/heyhello Riley Rose

girl, yes!
Bill

Please….. ” If a person has the ability to comfortably joke about rape, what’s stopping them from actually raping someone? In my eyes, I see nothing stopping them. It really, truly scares me.”

I’m sorry but comedians are doing it because it’s offensive, and people like offensive. They don’t advocate or support rape, obviously. It’s understood to be a terrible thing and no amount of jokes will ever undermine that fact.

I respect women in the same exact capacity that I respect men, and to be so offended at something so minute is preposterous. Get over it.
- http://www.facebook.com/alisse.desrosiers Alisse Marie
  
  Nah, you don’t get to decide what should and shouldn’t offend other people.
  - Bill
    
    Everything is offensive to someone. If you can’t handle Tosh.O, don’t watch it.
    - http://www.facebook.com/alisse.desrosiers Alisse Marie
      
      I don’t watch it. The issue isn’t even that his whole deal is making offensive jokes, as bad as that is. The issue is that he targeted a female member of his audience and made her feel threatened and violated without even touching her. This is not a man who deserves to be admired by anyone.
- http://www.facebook.com/taylor.blakin Taylor Blakin
  
  i posted this elsewhere, but here you go, bill:
  
  here’s the bottom line (and i read this in an article so i’m paraphrasing and expanding on what i remember):
  
  men who are in prison for rape were interviewed and asked how they think other men felt about what they had done/rape jokes in general. the men literally believed that nothing was wrong with having raped a woman because when they would discuss or joke about rape with their male friends, the reception was always positive (laughter, continued joking, etc.) they took this as a sign of acceptance and allegiance. this didn’t necessarily cause them to rape outright, but it most likely pushed them over the edge because they now believed that their friends/most men in general supported their actions. they’re sitting in jail right now believing that they are still well-liked, supported members of society and that people like tosh appreciate their actions.
  
  so more than just forwarding an already-thriving rape culture, by making rape jokes, you are actually telling other men out there, and possibly would-be or already-did rapists, that what they will do/did is a-ok with you. it’s a fact.
  
  so take a long hard look in the mirror and ask yourself if you’re ok allying with a rapist. i believe the statistic is about 1 in 40 so that’s about 1 rapist in every class (if you’re a student) or 2 at work (if you’re in the work force). that’s not even counting those who are simply contemplating it. do you really want to risk making a rape joke aloud or supporting tosh and having them overhear you and either raping someone because of your perceived approval or believing that you support the rape that they already committed? think about it. no really, think about it.
  
  so actually, they do advocate and support rape: whether intentionally or not. it doesn’t really matter because “woops, i support rape by accident” doesn’t really fly with anyone, i don’t think. it’s whether they’re willing to own up to their influence or deny any responsibility for their actions that is the question here. what kind of man are you really, bill?
  - Bill
    
    If someone told you it was acceptable to kill someone, would you do it? If someone told you to jump off a bridge, would you do it? No. I doubt you would. The point being that we as humans are ultimately capable of making our own choices. Tosh is not ‘allying with rapists’ by making rape jokes. As sad as it is that anyone would find that subject laughable, offensive shock comedy is his style. It is his right to speak freely and everyone should respect that. If you dislike it, go watch something else.
    - heyrachel
      
      lmao i’ll respect his right to free speech by not castrating him for it, but no way in hell does that mean i’m not gonna free speech all fucking day about what a piss poor excuse for a man/comedian/human being he is
      - whyamidoingthis
        
        Wait, making a joke abut cutting off a man’s dick is ok to do? that sounds like sexual violence to me. but it’s ok, right? because you aren’t a comedian and you really didn’t mean it? would you ACTUALLY castrate someone? chances are, i’m hoping, you wouldn’t. and chances are also pretty high that you wouldn’t actually be advocating for people to forcibly castrate someone.
      - heyrachel
        
        lmao
    - http://www.robotsandlace.com/ Jess Mary
      
      free speech goes both ways. tosh can say whatever he wants. nobody’s saying we should put him in jail for it. but we have a right to talk about what he’s talking about. By your logic, you didn’t like this article, but you believe in free speech, so just don’t read it. but you’re commenting on it because you want to have your opinion heard. alisse wants her opinion heard and she has every right to that.
    - Hayley
      
      The original poster is specifically referring to the fact that he called out an audience member and made her feel attacked, mortified, and fearful just because she called accused him of going too far. You refuse to acknowledge that and are defending the man who did it. Nice one, Bill.
    - Kate Rayes
      
      Bill, you’re missing Taylor’s point: these people aren’t raping because someone told them it was acceptable. They are doing it because they feel like they will be supported/even better liked for doing it.
      
      Let me explain: Scenario 1: They wanted to rape, someone said it was okay, so they did it. Story over.
      
      Scenario 2: They wanted to rape, they felt they would be better liked and supported and have more friends/gain more allies if they raped (cost/benefit analysis), so they raped. Story over.
      
      On the one hand, they are merely seeking permission. On the other hand, they see raping as a way of fitting in. You’re oversimplifying the issue.
- Kate Rayes
  
  If rape was understood to be a terrible thing, why does it happen so regularly? Why why why why why.
  
  Throwing around loaded words like “minute” and “preposterous” is radically disrespectful of this author and her experiences.
Maxie Ray

I am disappointed how sexist this article is. Not ONCE did you mention male-on-male sexual assault, which is joked about and made fun of MUCH more often and openly in film and television. Yes, Daniel Tosh went too far with THIS ONE joke and THIS ONE audience member, but that’s what he does. Now, I can’t even BEGIN to count the times a film or a television program has mocked a man being raped or molested in prison or at the gym. Maybe we need to look at our society’s overall blase attitude toward sexual assault, rather than vilify ONE man who took his shtick too far. And really, you want to take Daniel Tosh off the air for shutting down a heckler? But I bet you’d laugh at the implied rape in the second Harold and Kumar movie. Shame on you, and your faux feminist agenda.
- http://www.facebook.com/alisse.desrosiers Alisse Marie
  
  You’re right, I didn’t mention male-on-male assault and I should have. But that doesn’t make the article sexist. Non-inclusive? Absolutely. But not sexist.
  
  Society’s attitude towards rape–any and all rape–is saddening. That doesn’t mean that I have no reason to hone in on Daniel Tosh. The guy took it too far and deserves to be criticized and punished for it.
  
  For the record, the implied rape in H&K2 made me so uncomfortable I left the theater. Do not make assumptions about my sense of humor and agenda based on an article.
- http://www.robotsandlace.com/ Jess Mary
  
  Male-on-male sexual assault is not funny either. I think your statement that “we need to look at our society’s overall blase attitude toward sexual assault” is absolutely correct. That doesn’t mean that we should give Tosh a pass. Rather, it means we should stop giving all sorts of people a pass. Free speech works both ways–Tosh has the right to say whatever he wants, and everyone has the right to talk about why he’s wrong to say it.
  
  Also, let’s remember that male-on-male sexual assault is a very different beast than male-on-female sexual assault. It occurs primarily (not TOTALLY but primarily) in prisons. I am not trying to minimize it in any way but there is a difference in threatening a woman with rape and threatening a man with rape. Most women are taught to fear rape anywhere, any time, from any one. That means that rape is loaded totally differently for women. That doesn’t mean it’s okay to threaten men with rape, but just it is differently loaded. Just as it’s differently loaded for gay people and trans* people, who often are threatened with rape as a hate crime. Every single time someone has brought up Daniel Tosh anywhere on the internet, someone’s responded with talk about men being raped, and nowhere have I seen any kind of coherent argument about why.
- heyrachel
  
  i am loving the sudden hate for “hecklers” everywhere on the internet. shows like tosh.0 have played a pretty good trick on almost-witty writer everywhere by convincing them that if one asshole can have a shitty show on comedy central, so can you!
- Jay
  
  Nowhere in this article does the author imply that prison rape is funny. In fact, it’s pretty clear that the central point is that RAPE IS NOT FUNNY, period, so why use this straw man argument?
Moe

Of course this came from tumblr. i never thought i’d defend rape, much less daniel tosh, but this girl paid money to see the performance. Perhaps she could’ve done some research into the comedians beforehand and this passionate triade could have been aborted before its conception.

I don’t find Tosh.0 interested in the slightest, and I would indeed petition for his show to be taken off the air, but not because he offended someone with a comedic bit. Comedians are supposed to shock and challenge static assumptions. Perhaps if this victimized lady had listened to his bit, she could have picked up on some nuances of irony or absurdity, and found them humorous.

Please find a real cause to support.
- heyrachel
  
  eddie mcneckbeard, is that you? perhaps if you did some research into the nuances of human interaction, you would understand why you’re a huge douchebag.
http://twitter.com/themodernmartha Kelsey Reddick

Tosh is offensive, and the girl should have known that. On the other hand, I completely agree that rape is never funny. Double edged sword I suppose.
Kasey

No one cares, get over yourself. I like how you say that “10k people can’t be wrong” on your futile little petition, but I guess the nazi’s and taliban weren’t wrong either by your illogical statements.
- http://www.facebook.com/alisse.desrosiers Alisse Marie
  
  There are so many things wrong with this comment.
  
  If no one cares, then why have nearly 20,000 people signed the petition? Why is that number still growing? Clearly, plenty of people care.
  
  Secondly, are you seriously comparing ending a guy’s (who will absolutely continue to be famous and do stand-up tours, mind you) television show, to terrorism? Are you kidding me right now? Check yourself, please.
trwr

tl;dr Rape jokes are plenty funny. Just look up George Carlin, Louis CK, Jimmy Carr, Reginald D Hunter.

There is nothing inherently unfunny about ANY subject.
- http://www.facebook.com/alisse.desrosiers Alisse Marie
  
  Just because comedians make rape jokes doesn’t mean they are funny.
  - Sam Moore
    
    Just because you disagree with them doesn’t mean they aren’t.
Lou

As someone who has been raped, rape jokes make me sick to my stomach. To the point where my boyfriend also finds them upsetting and offensive. They dont only offend women rape victims, but also those close to them.
- Alizée
  
  I don’t think you have to have been a victim to find those jokes upsetting and offensive. They make my blood chill and my mouth dry up. Rape is the worst kind of violence in that it is a total negation of an individual by using him or her as a body and erasing his or her will, identity, mind, choices, personality and history. It is objectification at its most extreme and abject, and I can’t fathom what kind of a human being could turn that into laughing matter and hereby associate themselves with it. Rape jokes aren’t just offensive and upsetting for rape victims (although I can’t imagine how horrible it must be and am not belittling their pain in the slightest), they also convey an incredibly violent, dehumanising message towards anyone who hears them.
  By the way, this issue doesn’t just affect women. More men get raped in the UK than women (probably something to do with the gay jokes and stigma…). I wonder if the rape jokers would found it as funny if the jokes dealt with male victims.
  - http://twitter.com/abbeybabbling Abigail Lewis
    
    More men get raped in the UK than women?! I don’t think so. Like, that is surely vastly inaccurate.
Critical Thinker

This article is completely ridiculous. The woman BOUGHT A TICKET to Tosh’s show. She accepted his offensive material. She sat there through murder, racist, retard and faggot jokes and then got offended at a rape joke.
If Tosh had said “I hope this lady gets murdered.” There wouldn’t have been any uproar. Rape is terrible, but it is not worse than murder. There, then, is the hypocrisy.
There are people who have suffered violent bigoted-ness, parents who have horribly disabled children, people who’s family or friends may have been murdered. They laugh at the jokes, or they don’t go to the show.
When someone says “I hope you get murdered. What if 5 guys just murdered you right now?” there’s no uproar. There would be no posts on feminist blogs. Hypocrisy?
He’s not seriously wishing sexual violence and intense emotional violation on anyone. That’s obvious. It’s the same way someone calls the person being annoying a “faggot.” There’s no wish of bodily harm, discrimination or degradation in that. It doesn’t really even mean homosexual anymore. That’s the culture. And I say this as an avid supporter of gay rights and women’s equality.
Think About It

I don’t understand why someone would go to an extremely offensive comedian’s show and then be offended. Those girls sat there and listened to horrible (but undoubtedly hilarious) jokes about death, racism, retardation and who knows what else. The whole point is to push boundaries and shock. Absolutely nothing can be taken seriously.
There are people who have suffered violent bigoted-ness, parents who have horribly disabled children, people who’s family or friends may have been murdered. They laugh at the jokes, or they don’t go to the show.
When someone says “I hope you get murdered. What if 5 guys just murdered you right now?” there’s no uproar.
He’s not seriously wishing sexual violence and intense emotional violation on anyone. That’s obvious. It’s the same way someone calls the person being annoying a “faggot.” There’s no wish of bodily harm, discrimination or degradation in that. It doesn’t really even mean homosexual anymore. That’s the culture.

“If a person has the ability to comfortably joke about rape, what’s stopping them from actually raping someone? In my eyes, I see nothing stopping them. It really, truly scares me.”

There’s no other word for that but stupid. I joke about murder all the time. How likely am I to murder someone? I can tell you that I’d never murder anyone, but watch the news. If I get arrested I’ll throw up a Wu Tang hang sign at the cameras.
Steve

fuck off, if tosh’s jokes weren’t offensive or controversial they wouldn’t be funny – and without funny jokes he would not have a show. Rape is not an easy subject but if you have a problem with offensive jokes, specifically rape jokes, you should not be watching the show…
- http://www.facebook.com/melissa.d.sa Melissa De Sa
  
  By your logic, you shouldn’t be reading this article either. You didn’t like what you read, but you commented anyways. We don’t like his jokes, so we comment. If he has the right to say something, then so does everyone else.
James

As someone that has been raped, you all need to get over your fuckingselves. Seriously, what the fuck? SO because you got raped, that means it is forever blacklined with “do not make joke about”?
You and I know that you have laughed at things that have been seen as offensive by others, yet you would laugh anyway. I’m actually sick of this.Why is it that the majority of the female gender thinks it shouldn’t be a joke if they have suffered from the the joke is about?
I will never black line rape jokes as “never to be joked about” until murder, death, domestic abuse, and all those other things that are far worse than rape gets blacklined. You think simply because you’re women, and that women suffer more from what these jokes are about, that it should be blacklined? No.

Boohoo, rape happens? So do most of the negative things worse than rape that comedians joke about, yet those things don’t “grind your gears”? Ugh. The annoying thing is, the majority of people saying “this is offensive, wah” are females.
James

Boo fucking hoo. There are worse things than rape that get joked about, and I am sure you have shared a laugh with such things, yet because a joke that is about an offensive thing that “women” mainly go through, it somehow isn’t acceptable? I am getting sick of these over emotional women, they are really irritating the rest of society. You were raped, we get it, that doesn’t permanantly put a black line through the idea of rape jokes. Murder gets joked about all the time in comedy shows, yet rape should never be joked about? Are you serious? Get over yourselves, women, it’s a joke. You are not shielded by dark humour. If rape is off the table to joke about, then all offensive things should be, not just problems women mainly go through.

I was molested as a child, and I can laugh over a molestation joke. Why? Because I am not some mid thirties, over emotional woman.

Grow up. You don’t run this society, you don’t get to say what is acceptable and what’s not, especially when you’re the gender that done less to create such a civilization/society.
Kathi

I have never found rape jokes funny, but when I became a victim to an assault I started finding them offensive and I feel the exact same as you. I feel genuinely scared that people can laugh at the matter. When I first met my boyfriend he never saw a problem with making jokes about it, and this terrified me. Thankfully, he’s a much different person now. It seems to me unless you have directly been affected by it (Whether it happened to you or someone you love/know) you’re more likely to make such sick jokes. I wouldn’t wish that it happened to someone Daniel Tosh knows so he could the seriousness of the situation, I think it would be nicer of me to wish him dead. This needs to stop and people need to understand.
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Dear god. It doesn’t take a genius to know that anything can be funny: humor is just some people’s way of dealing with things. Just because Daniel Tosh made a comment about rape doesn’t mean he’s going to go out and rape someone… I mean COME ON. You have to be EXTREMELY short-sighted to be SO offended by a joke that obviously was not meant to seriously hurt anyone. You mentioned how it upsets you when people brush off situations in which someone was actually sexually assaulted: I agree, that’s not right. But how it upsets you even more when people make jokes?? In making jokes, people are not excusing rape, endorsing rape, or planning TO rape anyone: so why the hell is it such a bloody sin?? Look, my best friend was raped. It was a horrible, terrifying experience for her and everyone who cared for her: but you know what? If someone makes a generalized joke about rape or anything borderline offensive: she takes it lightly and, or occasion, actually finds it funny. Quite frankly, she’d probably read this little blog post and laugh her ass off. You all don’t seem to understand that there is a difference between someone saying something, and someone MEANING something. If Daniel Tosh had said something like “I wish I could rape you right now”, that would be a different story. THAT I could understand people being butthurt about: but, to be honest, all I see is a bunch of radical feminists, bored out of their minds, trying to find anything even moderately offensive to circle in on and cry sexism like the little boy who cried wolf. Just because something isn’t funny to you, doesn’t mean it isn’t funny to other people: and, regardless of your head in the clouds, you’re anything but above anyone else. So, please, tell me about how Daniel Tosh should drop to his knees and beg YOUR forgiveness when there have been people, most likely more offended, that didn’t get shit from him.